Month: November 2017

Relying on God’s Strength

Posted on by genushealth Posted in Faith Based ArticlesTagged , , , , , ,

We often hear people talk about relying on God’s strength through the difficult times.  But what does that look like?  How do we find strength for the long haul, especially when we are so tired?

We can learn from the ways Jesus handled His own caregiving responsibilities while on Earth.

  • He frequently spent time alone in prayer
  • He often prayed with His closest friends
  • He publicly thanked God the Father for what God had provided.
  • He faced each crisis with calm assurance because He had placed His confidence in God
  • He delegated work to other people
  • He grieved the losses of those He loved with a sense of hope, because He had an eternal perspective

I am sure if you think and pray upon it, you will find many examples from Jesus’ life that model for us the attributes that can make our caregiving more rewarding and fulfilling. But even if we just focus on the above points, we can grow closer to our Lord as we do the work of being His hands and feet for our loved ones.

Look to Jesus as your ultimate model of a Giver of Care (emotionally and spiritually), and follow His example in your own caregiving work.  Obviously prayer is an important part of this, as ½ of his techniques involved prayer.  If you are at a loss for prayer, don’t worry.  God already gave us one;  The Lord’s Prayer.  Don’t forget to ask others to pray for you and your family as you navigate this difficult time of life.  I know when I have had my greatest pain and hardships, I could actually feel the prayers of others when I felt too lost to pray myself.

Jesus faced each crisis with calm assurance because He had placed His confidence in God.  We need to ask ourselves if we are keeping God’s promises forefront in our mind; which can be difficult to do when overwhelmed with your own life, plus taking care of someone.  How can I switch over to this calm assurance?  For myself, I leave post it notes on the mirro in my bathroom.  Little inspirational sayings or bible verses.  Goodness knows that my mind is so busy thinking of what I have to do next, that these positive thoughts might never enter my brain if I don’t have some sort of reminder.  The same goes for the eternal perspective.  Reminders and prayers work.

Yes, Jesus delegated.  You can too!  Using the Genus™ app, you can create a care circle of friends and family to provide respite care or perhaps a meal.  If your church is involved with using Genus™, then maybe you can enlist help there as well.  Don’t feel you shouldn’t ask for help.  Jesus asked for help.   Remember that you are providing an opportunity for others to be blessed by being His hands and feet for your loved one.  Being a martyr and trying to do it all yourself doesn’t honor God or your loved one.

Jesus did all these things and more.  We can use him as our Givers of Care Role Model.  He wants to help.  All we have to do is ask!

 

 

 

Understanding Dementia, the Ultimate Thief

Posted on by genushealth Posted in for givers of care, UnderstandingTagged , , , , ,

Understanding dementia and all its complexities cannot be done in one article, or neither by reading an entire book.  Hence is why there are countless people who have dedicated their careers to helping us better understand this debilitating condition.  There are many books out there, and one of the best, and most easy to read books I have found is called “Experiencing Dementia”  by H. Norman Wright.  It is a short, easy to read book and very reasonably priced on Amazon (less than $5.00)

The author has been diagnosed with early stages of dementia after years of being a caregiver for a handicapped son and eventually, his own wife.  After doing his own research, both academically and experientially, he skillfully describes the condition in an easy to understand manner.

Dementia is not a disease in itself; but rather a group of symptoms that result from other sources, or diseases.  It is basically an ‘umbrella term’ used to describe the many symptoms that interfere with normal life functioning.  There are several types of dementia, with Alzheimer’s accounting for somewhere between 60-80% of all cases (over 5 million cases).  The other most common types of dementia are:

  • Vascular Dementia
    • small silent strokes
  • Dementia with Lewy Bodies
    • Abnormal clumps of protein form in the brain causing never cells to degenerate
  • Frontotemporal Dementia
    • The area of the brain responsible for behavior is gradually eroded
  • Normal Pressure Hydrocephalus
    • Used to be called ‘Water on the Brain’ because of buildup of fluid on the brain
  • Mild Cognitive Impairment (MCI)
    • Change of IQ functioning

What our loved ones with dementia are facing:

  • Memories and abilities that they have worked their entire life to obtain, are being slowly stolen from them
  • Great emotional pain: for both Receivers of Care and Givers of Care
  • Loss of self: one of the greatest losses a person can face
  • Emotional issues and personality changes as a result of the part of the brain responsible for emotions and memory is affected (the amygdala)
  • Sleeplessness due to the brain stem being affected
  • Loss of memory is extremely frightening; our memories give us life!

Dementia is a terrible thief.  It robs people of their memories, abilities, personalities, coping abilities, sleep, and eventually physical functions.  How couldn’t this change a person?  It is so out of their control, we must remember that.  It helps me to put myself in the place of a dementia patient, and try to imagine how I would feel.  Yes, this is a scary exercise.  But if it’s scary just thinking about it, imagine how it is to live with it!  Bone chilling to consider.

One fact is certain.  Regular, consistent, positive visits from family and friends is the biggest source of relief for our loved ones, even if they don’t remember it later.  Imagine how frightened they must feel.  Spreading out visits will help with that.   Using the Community module in the Genus™ app, you can look back over past data and see how you and your care circle are doing with providing consistent contact with your loved one.  You can correlate that to other date  you might be tracking, such as physical mobility and/or mood.  Then using the calendar function, you can easily plan visits so that they don’t overlap too much and are spread out to best benefit the patient.

Using the Moments module, you can take pictures of special people, places and events that will help stimulate positive conversation during your visits.  Using your smart phone during a visit, you can share the photos with your loved one, or just listen to some music.  We have also taken pictures of bible verses images and other inspirational sayings that we use when visiting my mom.  She is always grateful for the wisdom shared and seeing it in writing is different than hearing it from a family member.  More authoritative and less “bossy”.

Yes, dementia is a thief.  But armed with information and tools, we can minimize the damage and provide the best love and support we can for our loved ones.

I Want To Go Home!

Posted on by genushealth Posted in Care Stories, For young givers of care, UnderstandingTagged , , , , ,

If you are caring for emotionally distraught loved one who uses the “I want to go home!”  phrase over and over; then you have probably felt some frustration with how to respond to that.   If your Receiver of Care is in a facility, or another person’s home; then it is understandable why they are saying that phrase repeatedly.  However, what if your Receiver of Care is already home?  How should you respond?  What will calm your loved one down?  What are they really saying?

Maybe the following story, about a young Giver of Care, Anna, will provide some light on the subject:

Anna was a sweet 13 year old girl, who was emotionally distraught over some sad family situations.   Her grandfather was suffering from Alzheimer’s and her parents were in the middle of a very sad divorce.  It was a very lonely and troubling time for Anna.   One night, things seemed more than she could bear.  ‘”Dad…I want to go home… I want to go home.. I want to go home”, she kept repeating, through her broken sobs.

Her Dad, trying to comfort his daughter, asked Anna to explain what she meant.  His heart broke for his daughter, as she answered through her tears, “Back to when everything was okay, when we were traveling, singing, camping, and everything was okay!”

What a profound moment for Anna’s dad.  As he was sitting in his home with his upset daughter, he realized HOME is not necessarily a physical place.  HOME is a safe place.  A time when things were good.  Bingo!

The following morning, Anna’s dad was visiting his father, a patient at an Alzheimer’s memory unit .   The elderly man began his visit as he often did, repetitively saying,  “I want to go home”.  Ordinarily that would lead to a ‘logical, and unproductive attempt’ to reason that this is his new home.  That morning however, armed with a deeper understanding of home, a heartfelt reply came forward.  “Yes, let’s go home Dad.”

They held hands as they walked and talked  about fond memories: when his father taught him fishing, when they built a tree house together and even how his father decided to ask his mom for her hand in marriage.  It wasn’t long before the elderly gentleman felt peace and he stopped asking to go home.  When they returned to his apartment within the memory unit he asked, “Is this where I live?  It sure seems nice!”

 Other siblings began using this same approach and over time, this helped him transition to his new and final place of residence at the memory care unit.  Equally valuable, this approach of ‘changing the subject’ led to more meaningful and healing visits for all involved!

 Research confirms, when we are upset, talking about a time when life was more pleasant is therapeutic and triggers a chemical reaction that helps brings a sense of clam.

The take away?  As a caregiver sometimes it’s simply best to accept that “being right” isn’t the answer, i.e. it’s not the time to say, “Dad, enough already .. you are home”.  It may be best to take our loved ones for a walk down memory lane!

The wonderful young woman who inspired this story is the daughter of the developer of Genus.  Anna couldn’t have been kinder to her grandfather when he was suffering with Alzheimer’s and shared many wonderful, and yes, repetitive conversations about his past.